Courtesy and Creativity.

What is courtesy? Courtesy is stuff we do that pisses people off, in the name of not pissing people off. Courtesy is the socially accepted form of annoyance.

It is impossible to be a creative person whilst maintaining a courteous facade. Creative people can't stand being *interrupted*. I can't stand it when people barge in to my little private world, and ask stupid questions like 'why do I talk to myself' and 'do I know that they can hear me singing in the shower?'. I said I was creative, not dumb.

Speaking of dumb - I absolutely cannot stand dumb people. We are the species that conquered the world - we invented everything that wasn't on the periodic table. Unless you are medically retarted, you're just being fucking lazy.

Why are people so stupid? If you can't hold a decent conversation at the age of sixteen then you're a lost cause. Sixteen - you're legally allowed to be mothers at sixteen. I weep for humanity.

What has happened to humanity? You take one look at refugees - or specifically, how we treat them - and you feel almost as if humanity has failed.

What is failure? Perhaps I have failed. Perhapse we are all failures. But how do we know? How do we know otherwise?

The Joke's On Me.

Australia is a racist, xenophobic, sexist and religiously-intolerant place. We have a whole history of racism - towards Asians, Aboriginals...anyone who's not white, male and Christian. We're good at being racist, and we're good with being racist.

We are also famously good at denying things and pretending we're all democratic and lovely.

The problem is jokes. We somehow think that we can say whatever we want, as long as we say 'it was just a joke' afterwards. Actually, no, you don't even have to say that. All you have to say is 'LOL!'.

Australians have to wake up and realize that a joke is not an acceptable pretext to say something that is racially or otherwise insensitive. Growing up as an Asian and as a woman I've had the most appalling things said to me, but they get away with it because they always say it was 'just a joke'. I'm tired of the joke always being on me. It's not my fault that I am what I am. I am proud of what I am, but most importantly, I am proud that it is my right not to have to put up with this fucking bullshit. A smile can't erase scars.

It's not funny to say to a woman 'go make me a sandwich' or 'get back to the kitchen'. It's not funny to call me a slitty-eyed or an Asian cunt. I am a citizen and as a citizen - fuck, as a fucking human being - I was taught by proper decent parents not to take the mickey out of race, or sex, or culture. Apparently teaching Australian children to grow up and behave is beneath us. It doesn't matter if you say you don't mind if it happened to you, because to be honest, it doesn't happen to you unless you've spent your whole life being a colour. I have lived my whole life with white teachers and white students saying that they're not being racist, and being upset when I say that they are. Why is it my fault, huh? I'm trying to stand up for myself, and you knock me down. And call me a chink and a slut whilst you're at it.

Can of Worms #3

Worm #8: Should young women stop dressing so slutty?
The long and short of it: No.

My Say: First of all, I'm almost sure it should be 'should young women stop dressing so sluttily', but never mind that. As an advocate of topfreedom and against the burqa ban (weird combination, but hey, I never pretended to be normal, or sane) I believe that we all have the right to choose how to present ourselves. Besides, what is 'slutty'? If you go to an Islamic nation, wearing shorts is slutty. Whereas here everything short of nudity is sorta A-OK.

Besides, it's a terrible assumption that all young women dress like sluts. I'm a young woman and I think I dress pretty appropriately for my age, but that's besides the point. All women are people, and all people have a libido and an interest in sex. Feeling and looking attractive is a natural desire for everybody, but for some reason it's perfectly fine for men to walk around in nothing but a pair of cutoffs and we have to start wearing tents.

I believe that laws and society do not have the right to dictate the personal choices of any individual - choices which, if you think about it, really don't matter in the whole scale of things.

Worm #9: Does telling a racist joke make you a racist?
The long and short of it: Yes.

Discrimination against race, sexuality or gender ranges from lynching to laughing, and it's the little things that count.We have no right to tell jokes at the expense of someone of a different race, and I personally think they're tasteless and vulgar. I also think that it is a case of from little things, big things grow - I truly believe in the power of words. Hitler was inspired in his ruthless persecution of Jews by one disparaging comment about some rich Jews in Vienna during the Great Depression.

I will continue posting my responses to worms here, but if you have a worm of your own I'd be happy to pull it apart in the most controversial, left-wing feminist way possible :).

11 reasons why I advocate topfreedom.

topfreedom: a cultural and political movement seeking to advance gender equality by the recognition of the right of women and girls to be topless in public on the same basis that men and women are permitted to be barechested.

1. The chest is an erogenous zone for both sexes. 

Most women would be lying if they weren't turned on by a guy with no shirt and ripped abs, but the majority of us have the etiquette to behave acceptably around half-naked men nonetheless, and men really should return the favour. The whole human body, essentially, is designed for mutual attraction. Why can't we just get over it?

2. Breasts are for children, not for ogling.

Topfreedom would allow for a greater acceptance of public nursing and intimacy between mother and child. In many primitive tribal cultures men as well as women go topfree or naked, and there are greater levels of closeness and intimacy between people and less instances of sexual harrassment and rape.

3. We should take greater pride in our bodies. 

In the name of gender equality and social libertarianism, it would benefit not only women but society in general if we all loosened up about our bodies.

4. Boobs are only sexualized because men never see them.

We all want what we can't have. I've seen so many barechested guys that it's not a huge deal anymore, and I bet the hype over breasts would die down if topfreedom was commonplace.

5. Sometimes it's so bloody hot. 

Do you know how jealous I am of guys who can just strip on really hot days? But no, we've got two sticks of wire, about three feet of padding plus a t-shirt between us and the breeze.

6. We all have the right to choose what to wear, and what not to wear. 

As a woman I have the right to choose whether I want to cover up or not. Everything from nudism to Islamic dress should be accepted as an individual right. We have the right to choose how to present ourselves.

7. Bras give men the wrong idea about breasts. 

We all look bigger when we're, ahem, supported. In reality, breasts are just as ugly and irregular as an arm or a leg, and we all have to learn to get over it.

8. Topfreedom isn't going to kill the clothing industry.

It's legally and socially acceptable for men to go topfree, but of course most do not - and it would be the same for women. It's not going to start a nudist subculture, or kill the clothing industry. Get over it.

9. If women can't do it, then men shouldn't do it.

Making topfreedom legally and socially acceptable would be a huge milestone in our battle for gender equality. If men can go barechested, then why can't we? 

10. Women don't go topfree to appear more sexually attractive or erotically appealing. 

Women should not be penalized for indecent behaviour for not wearing a top. People have no right to feel uncomfortable or threatened around a topfree woman, and if they do, studies have shown that they get over it if topfreedom is commonplace and accepted by the community.

11. Dress or conduct is never an excuse for rape or sexual harrassment. 

Men who blame sexual misconduct on the dress or conduct of their victims should be burned alive. There is never any excuse for murder, so why should there be an excuse for rape? It is immature for men to attempt to control women's bodies instead of taking responsibility for their own actions. We are all responsible for our own actions, and so topfreedom should be pursued in lieu of educating men to stop making excuses and keep their dick in their pants. Sorry, but it just had to be said. I'm sick of people - men, women, anybody - blaming others for their own behaviour. It's childlike and immature and completely beyond the pale in this day and age.

Julia, the Bible is not the be all and end all of everything.

On the surface Australia is such a progressive, modern country. We've got an unmarried living-in-sin atheist female PM from the supposedly left-wing major party. Yippee.

Or really?

You would think that democracy was a surefire way of getting what the majority wants, but no, apparently not. Our prime minister seems to be content in pissing off basically everybody in the country - first she pissed off the Christians by refusing to swear on the Bible, and then she pissed off the atheists by using the Bible as an excuse for her homophobic stance on gay rights.

Australia is supposed to be a secular country with secular politics, but we're anything but. Bible this, Bible that. You can't use religion as an excuse for everything, especially if you claim to be atheist. It just doesn't work.

There is only one place for the Bible - Christianity. And there is no place for Christianity, or any other religion, in politics. But why does it feel like I'm the only person who sees that?

Religion and Tradition. And Heresy, Sodomy and Femininity.

People underestimate teenagers. People treat us as though we have no capacity for independent thought or opinion. And you know what? A lot of us are snotty dimwits who really should be put in a home until further notice. But a lot of us have a lot to say. Including me.

After becoming a teenager I formed some very important ideas and opinions. I've decided I hated the education system and the education system was determined to hate me. I've decided that boys my age are cold, cruel and heartless and have decided that I am not good enough for them, so, conversely, they are not good enough for me. I've analyzed the sex war from all angles and I've decided to brand myself a feminist for better or for worse. Hitler and Mao Zedong have both scared the crap out of me so I'm on the other end of the spectrum - social anarchist, apparently. Whatever that means. But most importantly, I've decided that God and I are not really the best of chums and I'm better off just winging it alone.

I just find religion so confining. Religion is bloodstained and plagued with scandal, infected with corruption. With religion comes power, and power corrupts, holy or no. I've never been able to find peace in religion; being atheist I feel as if I've cut out the middle man. As much as I would love to lean on a higher order, seek comfort in the bosom of God or blame/rely on some kind of spirit to will things to my favour, I feel vulnerable at the idea of surrendering my control of my life to something I don't fully trust. As soon as you've got someone or something between you and your destiny it is too easy to become angry, or defeated, or overly dependent.

But I still have respect for religion, and for religious people. I always wonder if I'm missing out on something truly magical by turning away from all that is sacred and holy. I'm still not quite sure whether I'm blind or religious people are deluded. Sometimes in utter desperation I pray against prayer that someone is watching over me, but I've never fully been able to convince myself of the fact. A broken heart learns not to believe fairytales - for better or for worse.

But the thing that gets me most about religion is that as a society we cling to ancient, often outdated thoughts and opinions fed to us through holy texts, which are all old and obscure and strangely anonymous. We would not have such prejudices against women, or against homosexuals or blacks or Asians or any other group if we did not have these books telling us that we should. Society must move, people must move forward, the community must continually, eternally change. Humanity is not a static, stationary thing - it is fluid, always moving and changing, and this should be the same for our laws and societal mores. But no. We do the same things people did centuries, millenia ago - all for what? For the love of God? For the love of tradition? We all have blood on our hands. Holy blood is still blood.

Whenever I ask religious people why they are against gender, racial or sexual equality (discrimination and religion is not mutually inclusive or exclusive, but nonetheless, too commonplace to be 'coincidental') they honestly don't know. People have all these ridiculously strong and outdated opinions, but when you ask them why, they've got no answer. They just accept it as a given. They don't think. I'm sorry, but it takes more than a book and a God to make me make excuses for a bigot.

I feel, as an irreligious person, that I have clarity of thought. My thoughts are my own, and I can think straight. I'm not always a logical person, but I have my own reasoning. What is heresy? Sodomy? Femininity? Nothing, really. I would like to say that it's all in the mind, but it's not. It's all in the Book.

Suck it up, Ladies.

As much as I believe that men these days are more chauvinistic than chivalrous, I still think some ladies seriously have to suck it up, princess - just a little.

We're not going to achieve gender equality if women constantly expect men to be doormats to their every whim under the pretense of 'feminism' or whatever. I mean, seriously, the way I get treated by some men, and the horrific way women across the globe are treated by some men, even equality seems like too much to ask, let alone a complete dash of the status quo.

Women have to learn to hold their own, and not expect men to give up big chances and opportunities just to give you a bit more padding. Sure, walking curbside and opening doors and offering to carry heavy goods isn't really gonna hurt nobody, but in a competition situation gender is not an excuse for dibs.

A week or so ago on Masterchef Hayden Quinn was picked on by the press for being a little snappy at about-to-be-eliminated contestant Sun Etheridge, who in the heat of the competition didn't organize her time properly and ended up being the fourth person vying for a three-person fryer. Sun later, rather understandably, described his reaction as 'suck it up, princess', but rather unreasonably some have jumped to her defence, saying that momma's-boy Hayden should have been more courteous. What was he supposed to do, lose the competition so that the weakest link won? If the genders had been switched nobody would dare jump to Sun's aide.

I do think some people are taking this a little too far, picking on contestants on reality TV shows who cry. I know this looks bad on television, especially in a competitive setting, but seriously, crying is a natural reaction to stress and we gotta be a bit more understanding. We can't automatically assume that it's all an act, or that it's all a female act - I mean, c'mon. Hayden was crying last night.

It's sad in this day and age that we expect so much and do so little for the opposite sex. I know I'm not really practicing what I preach, but the world could do with less cynicism and more kindness.

Norway Massacre

My thoughts and prayers are with those affected by the 2011 Norway attacks. Know that hearts all around the world go out to Norway tonight, and that we stand united in times of peace and in times of war. We stand united against the threat of the Extreme Right.

Lady Solitaire
July 2011

Sexy Phantom

I am, amongst other things, a huge POTO fan. But being a bit new-age, I'm actually  huge fan of the movie, because I think the portrayal of Phantom and Christine, and their relationship, was right on the money.

In the book Christine is sixteen, young, beautiful, talented and sheltered. Excluding first and third point, I am Christine in the flesh and in a position to say that the Phantom is actually pretty damn appealing if he didn't look like Michael Crawford.

The Phantom is supposed to exude dark, restless masculinity and profound sexuality, and that is his appeal to
Christine, who later learns through kindness and compassion to overlook his physical deformities. To be honest, I don't think the musical really cuts it. Gerry Butler's Phantom hasn't got Luciano Pavarotti's vocal range but he's an artist, he's a composer and an architect - a really behind-the-scenes guy. If he was such a spaztastic singer why would he want Christine to sing in the first place? There's this hint of danger about the movie's Phantom, a sense of superiority coupled with vulnerability - and I think the Phantom's mystery and sheer power is what is most appealing to a girl like Christine, who, at sixteen, probably isn't the world's most butch feminist. Michael Crawford's voice is undeniable, but he hasn't got that rock star crooning that people have criticized so much about Butler. Michael Crawford's elderly uncle appearance doesn't really make him a viable love interest - the Phantom is meant to be eye candy. There's supposed to be something sinister, slightly unhealthy and Lolita about Christine and the Phantom but Michael Crawford lacked the sex appeal for the role, and it made it just too avuncular and pedophily.

So there you go - why Gerry Butler is my choice Phantom.

Honesty.

I confess I am a bit of a compulsive liar in that I may be lying dead in a ditch somewhere if I didn't tell little white lies all the time. I think I was born a storyteller, because I always exaggerate things - you know that cut? Yeah, I was gonna die of blood loss.

But this whole Murdoch phone-hacking scandal thing has made me realize that there are writer's out there that don't write honestly. Honesty is the purest, most honourable trait in a human being, especially in writing because writing is a trade in a reader's world - and readers need to trust writers, honest writers. This is a reason why I actually hate Rita Skeeter over Lord Voldemort, because Lord Voldemort never pretends he is any less grotesque than he is. But real life Rita Skeeters? This is unbelievable. I look at the people this scandal has hurt, the money it has cost, everything, and it really makes me sick. Not from a legal/ethical point of view as such, but I am a writer and this is all that is dear to me. I'm sure there are many people in the food industry who died inside when that Chinese baby formula scandal rose a few years back, purely because they have corrupted what is the pride and joy of many people - this is the same for me. I know that there are people out there hijacking writing for monetary gain, and to be honest, I don't really have a problem with that. But when you start crossing people, and when you start crossing the law...art cannot be used as an excuse for criminal behaviour.

I acknowledge that art is essentially lying, especially in acting and writing - but there's a right way to do it. There's a difference between fiction and backstabbing. There's a difference between fantasy and reality. There's a difference between killing off characters and hurting real people and I'm shocked that grown men and women fail to see this.

I know I'm a little green - I'm young, I haven't even graduated, I don't write for money because at this point I don't really need to. I write because I love it, and because I'm good at it, but I know that there are others who do not have this luxury and I respect that. But there are plenty of writers - artists - who have a roof over their head, food on their tables and a clear conscience. Writing should not be about backstabbing, about infringing privacy and damaging lives and reputations. Writing shouldn't be about law suits and angry parliamentary debates and uproar. I write because I love it - and everything I write comes from my heart and soul. Writing is something I hold dear to me; it is my weapon through this war of life, and my friend through times of utter desperation and heartbreaking loneliness. Writing is something very personal, but also very pure, and it kills me that people abuse such a talent in such a way. I acknowledge that Murdoch and the people in his empire must be incredibly talented people, but talented people don't hurt others; talented people don't get thrown into jail and splashed across the news because they have broken an artist's code.