"I don't think that being a strong person is about ignoring your emotions and fighting your feelings. Putting on a brave face doesn't mean you're a brave person. That's why everybody in my life knows everything that I'm going through. I can't hide anything from them. People need to realise that being open isn't the same as being weak."

- Taylor Swift

Thursday, June 20, 2013

speak now #1: introduction

Now Playing: Little Lion Man by Mumford & Sons (it was not your fault but mine, and it was your heart on the line, I really fucked it up this time, didn't I, my dear?)

Sooooooo regular readers of the crazy space known as my blog will know that I write a lot about sexuality - my own experiences with sexuality, feminism, LGBT issues, atheism in relation to religiously-informed societal attitudes towards sexuality...the whole shebang.

I have wanted to be a peer sex educator since I heard about Laci Green, who has an amazing Youtube channel called Sex+ and a super cool tumblr page. But, like all things I feel like...Australia really doesn't that much an internet presence in the conversations on sexuality and, well, I'd like to change that.

We live in such a heteronormative sex-negative society that sex is defined by silence - outside of extremely awkward and strictly anatomical high school health classes sex is just not talked about. Which makes no fucking sense, if you think about it - sex is the elephant in the room in all of us. Most of us want to have sex, we have all had sexual experiences, we are all sexual beings, we were all brought into this world by sex, so...it makes sense to me that something that can potentially be physically and emotionally damaging if not done right should be, you know, talked about. Sexuality, like life and other animals, doesn't come with a fucking instruction manual. You have to learn, and to learn, you have to talk.

Behind every silence is a stigma, and stigma is a toxic blend of two parts ignorance and three parts oppression with a whole lot of bullshit and propoganda thrown in to fill the gaps. If we talk about it, sex becomes normal - not any less beautiful or any less exciting, but a lot less intimidating and dangerous.

I'll be hijacking post scheduling and I hope to post a speak now post every day - they won't necessarily written on the same day like most of my other posts, but at least there will always be something interesting and not a poem/video/picture when you pop around and I cbf writing some long winded dissection of why this person/place/thing/ideology/religion/etc is a fuckwit. I was considering making this a separate blog but I have tried to manage more than one blog before and it doesn't work besides this blog is already established and because I'm not twelve and reckless anymore I don't like the idea of writing on an 'open forum' that is really only read by my mother. I'll be talking about my experiences with sexuality, sex positivity, sex positive terminology, depictions of sexuality and gendered interaction in popular culture as well as discussions of different sexual orientations and all that kind of stuff. I'll also be posting, like I have been, lots of links and videos of my favourite sex-positive spaces on the internet. You can ask me questions and make suggestions and get the conversation started in comments, although they will all be moderated and I reserve the right to ignore questions even if they are published - because, you know, I have my limits and boundaries and part of the sex positive conversation is about respecting that. This series will be numbered in the title and tagged with 'speak now'.

Stay tuned and stay beautiful.


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