"I don't think that being a strong person is about ignoring your emotions and fighting your feelings. Putting on a brave face doesn't mean you're a brave person. That's why everybody in my life knows everything that I'm going through. I can't hide anything from them. People need to realise that being open isn't the same as being weak."

- Taylor Swift

Tuesday, July 02, 2013

speak now #13: tumblr launch and my favourite internet haunts.

Now Playing: People Help the People by Birdy (those hard-faced queens of misadventure, God knows what is hiding in those weak and sunken lives, fiery thrones of muted angels, giving love but getting nothing back)

Soo...I have a tumblr. You can get to it here, plus there are links on the index page and at the bottom of every speak now post. Keep in mind that I'm still a relatively new tumblypoo and I'm very bad at technology. I will be reposting every speak now on my tumblr page, plus I'll be reblogging feminism and sexuality-related stuff. You can ask me anything on that 'ask me anything' section and I will answer it here and on tumblr. And if you follow me, I'll follow you! (and then I'll unfollow you if you're a fuckwit).

I just wanted to share with you some of my favourite sex-positive webspaces that gave me a lot of comfort and a sense of community when I was working out my sexuality and feeling very alone in an environment where sex was very hush-hush and taboo. I'm sure I'll forget some of them and I'll add more as an afterthought, but here goes: (in no particular order)


I LOVE LACI GREEN. I can't remember how I stumbled across her but oh boy, she is the sex-positive icon and her webspaces are a safe haven with a generous side of humour.


...Did I mention I love Laci Green?


Laci Green + Planned Parenthood = suck it, abstinence education and religious indoctrination. We're ridding the world of STIs and unwanted pregnancies the real way.


I very recently became a nerdfighter and I love the vlogbrothers and nerdfighteria because it's such a liberal, open community, and one of the few online communities where acceptance and tolerance are really blatant themes. The main vlogbrothers channel isn't heavily focused on sexuality, but it is mentioned in a handful of videos, especially in regards to homophobia and the acceptance of gay marriage.


Again, not extremely sexuality-oriented by nonetheless a safe sex-positive webspace. Also I kind of have a crush on John Green.


Produced by Hank Green and hosted by Dr Lindsey Doe, Sexplanations is a relatively new but extremely valuable sex-positive resource that I am loving.


Non-biased, non-prejudiced, fun and engaging crash courses in world history, U.S. history, chemistry, biology, ecology and English literature. And, of course, the inevitable sex and gender that comes with all of the above.


I'm not a very science-minded person so I find these short trivia snippets easier to digest than the sciencey crash course series. Sexuality does pop up sporadically.


A free American sex education website aimed at filling in the gaps of conventional sex education. Awesome resource, especially for teenagers.


A lot of people ask me what my academic training and work is like and this is the closest example I can think of. Anita Sarkeesian is a super awesome, inspirational person who has dealt with way too much cybercrap when she deserves our respect. She's a kick-ass feminist, a kick-ass academic and I love her. Very much.


Savage Love is an internationally syndicated sex column and podcast by the one and only Dan Savage. Crass, crude, and totally NSFW, but it provides a brutally honest and compassionately frank discussion of all the sexy taboos - homosexuality, fetishes, sex toys, masturbation, relationship problems, monogamy, etc etc etc. Reading Savage Love has not only provided me with hours of entertainment but also helped me normalise things that I used to find weird or gross about sexuality. Also, I have a crush on Dan Savage.


Clips from Dan Savage's tours of colleges. Very funny and very honest advice.


The It Gets Better Project is a powerful and inspiring initiative to bring hope and courage to LGBTIQ people with the simple, universal message of no matter how bad things are, it always gets better.


A miniseries discussing sex and addressing the gaps in sex education, aimed at a UK audience.


Don't laugh, I know it sounds stupid but Wikipedia is a fantastically factual and non-judgemental resource to look up things like terminology (which, let's face it, can get very confusing once you go beyond man/woman straight/gay) as well as information about birth control and other things like that. I know a lot of people use Wikipedia as a sexuality resource, especially LGBT people or people who don't have access to comprehensive sex education.

I use all these resources extensively both in maintaining my own sexual health and adding to my own personal knowledge of human sexuality, but also in writing Speak Now - you'll notice I add lots of videos after lots of the posts, and that's the result of scouring all of my favourite youtube channels for fun, informative videos about sexuality. If you know of any other sex-positive webspaces and internet resources, please let me know!

I think that's it. Stay tuned and stay beautiful!


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