There are two types of teenagers in this world.

One type we all hate...

...and one type most hate.

Teenagerdom is not exactly a popular phase of life, even though it's one of those unavoidable things, like women can't avoid being women and gay people can't avoid being gay. But, anyway.

The first type of teenager are more adequately described as whining couch potatoes that have to be fed too much and given expensive things like iPods and Wiis. These people, if they're pretty, end up as trophy wives or, if they're unlucky, divorced teenage-preggers check-out chicks. If they're not pretty, then...well, use your imagination, because they don't have much.

The second type are subdivisible, but basically they're the teenagers who do stuff. Most adults don't like this because they don't like being outshined by people younger than them, and have this they're-still-at-school-mwahahaha-so-we'll-keep-treating-them-like-children complex. Oh, and they have this other complex I call I-know-I-said-they're-children-but-we'll-give-them-adult-sized-loads-of-homework-mwahahahaha.

I want to be the second type.

Second type teenagers. Not many, you say. WRONG, I say!

Unfortunately, I'm forced to associate with Legolas, who is stubbornly type one.