Chums.

I ventured bravely to the other side of the river a few days back, to the part of town where I used to live. And, because Perth is pathetically small and decent malls are hard to come by, I naturally saw quite a few schoolmates from primary school.

This is a very loose interpretation of the word 'mate', here. Actually, it's a loose interpretation on the word 'school', too - such a word normally implies a place where you actually learn something.

But it's odd, how people grow in your absence. Voices become deeper and deeper, until all of your childhood sweethearts speak like Darth Vader. The fat ones become skinny, the skinny ones becme fat. Hair and spots erupt in places you'd never imagine the hot guy to succumb to. The pious ones take vulgar pictures for their IM display pictures, and the free spirits become grounded and tied down by reality. It's truly fascinating.

I can't believe some of the stories I hear about the people I grew up with. Some of them are so bizarre I cannot put face to scandal, but, what happens happens.

Out of the ninety or so people who graduated in the class of '08, I am one of only three who eventually made it to Perth Modern. It wasn't because I was any better, it was because I dared to be better. There were so many, some far greater than I could ever dream to be, who chose not to take the fantastic opportunity, because it wasn't where the herd was going. It's sad.

Of course, sometimes my teenageness gets the better of me and I feel like they've made the wiser decisions. They've got cliques, friends, boyfriends, things I can only dream of - and I'm not ashamed to say I dream of them. I have given up everything, it seems, to battle to where I have gotten now. Every day stares and glares are shot in my direction, and sometimes I am brushed aside and ignored altogether. I hardly feel like the champion at the moment, but there are better things to come. Rochester and Darcy weren't sixteen year old schoolboys, and the dearest of friends are rarely made in the schoolyard. But still, I never expected to be so lonely.

But then I think about what they've given up - and what they'll have to give up if they want to stay like this, just one of the many. I have so much ahead of me, just by being who I am. And what I aim for are things that are dependable, reliable - grades, scholarships, universities. And what I want is the hard stuff, to say I've done this - certificates, trophies. I've always found it easier, in this world where there is nothing to rely on but what I can do. Because in other things, where you have to rely on people...well, people are less than reliable. If I fall, I at least want the satisfaction of saying it was all me, whether I win or lose. People are the weak link in my armour.

I am a naked soul. I've put myself out there, for all to see. And nudity of all sorts is a taboo in society. My chums probably understand this better than I do.