"I don't think that being a strong person is about ignoring your emotions and fighting your feelings. Putting on a brave face doesn't mean you're a brave person. That's why everybody in my life knows everything that I'm going through. I can't hide anything from them. People need to realise that being open isn't the same as being weak."

- Taylor Swift

Friday, October 26, 2012

just a quick little anology

Now Playing: All Too Well by Taylor Swift (you called me up again just to break me like a promise, so casually cruel in the name of being honest)

I will be blogging less now that WACE is looming - there will still be Music Monday/Wordless Wednesday/Video Friday/Sunday Wordles because they are quick and I can schedule them, but fewer polemics and rants. I will be back to renegade warp speed next year and I thank you all for your support.

I just wanted to give you a little food for thought because I am so sick of people saying that prostitutes 'deserve to be raped' or that paying a prostitute for sex also implies paying for consent, or all sorts of shit that connects rape and prostitution and money with 'okay'.

Think of a broker. A broker might love his job, he might hate it, he might be okay with it. A broker has to play with money to make ends meet, to pay the bills, to fund his lifestyle. A broker might be prosperous or he might plunge into poverty. A broker's job is all about money and people, but he can also use money outside of his job and he can also have non-professional relationships with others where no money is involved. A broker might donate money to charity and enjoy spending. A broker might enjoy money and might spend it or give it away with no strings attached. A broker might make his own stupid personal financial decisions outside of his job, and he might see money not only as part of his job but as a part of his leisure, too.

If a broker is robbed, it's a robbery. If a broker is assaulted, it's assault. If a broker is raped, it's rape.

Replace the word 'broker' with 'prostitute' and the word 'money' for 'sex'. Think of a prostitute. A prostitute might love her job, she might hate it, she might be okay with it. A prostitute has to play with sex to make ends meet, to pay the bills, to fund her lifestyle. A prostitute might be prosperous or she might plunge into poverty. A prostitute's job is all about sex and people, but she can also have sex outside of her job and she can also have non-professional relationships with others where no sex is involved. A prostitute might have sex 'for free' and enjoy sex. A prostitute might make her own stupid sexual decisions outside of her job, and she might see sex not only as part of her job but as part of her leisure, too.

If a prostitute is robbed, it's robbery. If a prostitute is assaulted, it's assault. If a prostitute is raped, it's rape.

(I'm using gender stereotypes, by the way. Of course there are female brokers and male prostitutes)

I do not understand how someone's personal choices and professional occupation negates the severity of crimes against them. Rape is rape whether the victim is male, female, cisgender, transgender, gay, straight, black, white, virgin, promiscuous - none of these things detract from the fact that rape is a violent act of non-consensual sexual aggression and that rape is a crime. And rape has never been excused if the rapist threw some money at the victim afterwards, so how is rape justified if someone throws money at a prostitute he just raped? Mugging someone and taking all their money is a crime regardless whether someone is dirt poor or filthy rich, and regardless of whether their job is about money or not. Same with rape and sex. A prostitute is paid for sex - she is not paid for consent and she is not paid to waive her rights as a human being. She is not paid to turn a blind eye to crime. Saying it's okay to rape someone because they have sex for a living or because they like it or because they have had sex 'for free' is saying it's okay to rob someone because they play with money for a living or because they like spending money or if they've given money to charity.

We've got to stop thinking of sex as something immoral and people who use sex for enjoyment or money are excluded from the protections of law and civic outrage at criminal offences. If you ask me, money is infinitely more corrupting than sex. I am so sick of ignorant, flippant, cheap humour that only thinly veils deeply misogynistic and sex negative thinking. People are people, and crimes are crimes.

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